okay, we've been off our blogging game here at worthy acres because first we paused our post rotation to play an email-a-yam-every-day game and since then we've been playing a lot of rpgs.
but now we're getting back on that wagon!
or i am at least. and hopefully i can get everybody else back in the swing.
xoxo,
claire
(we're just tearing our way through this module! if you want to read the start of it, go here. or, for what happened last time, try here!)
Judge Claire: Okay, yowzers, we've got our first first level characters of the game! Who's what?
Ariel: My characters are all still level 0.
MSG: Me too.
Elle: Ferze is now a cleric, Foxie's a warrior, and Likely's still an elf.
Hettie: Maurdine has chosen the path of wizardry, and Lune, larceny.
Sasha: A thief, huh? Sweet! As for my guys, I said last time.
Akane: This makes ... 3 clerics? Plus two of elves and one each warrior and thief?
Judge Claire: That's my count. Oh, and this may seem mean, but the spellcasters won't be able to use their spells until they've rested. Clerics can do their lay-on-hands right away, though.
MSG: What's Klutz finding out at this door?
Sasha: Sheesh, in a hurry much?
MSG: Hey, for all we know, those crystal things are charging themselves up from that torch and will come at us hard or blow up in a hail of razor-sharp glass shrapnel any second now.
Akane: My characters find this convincing. We proceed to the door.
Judge Claire: It looks like a perfectly normal door.
MSG: I'm going to look around for anything that looks like it might blast fire or shoot spears at us for opening the door.
Judge Claire: No sign of anything like that.
Elle: Having reached first level, Likely now has her heightened elven senses, correct? I'll walk along the walls of the room in case there are secret doors I might notice just in passing. I won't get too near the crystal torch-huddle, though.
Judge Claire: You don't come across any secret doors.
Ariel: Okay ... let's get out of this place, then. The crystal creepies are giving me the heebie jeebies.
MSG: Klutz opens the door.
Judge Claire: Beyond, you see a long, narrow room with shelves along the walls. Another door is at the far end of the room. Two tables stretch most of the distance to the door. You see that their surfaces are covered with miniature clay soldiers in formation around tiny hills and buildings. More of the soldiers are on the shelves.
Ariel: Ooh! Is it a game? Do we know how to play?
MSG: More importantly, are the miniature soldiers worth anything?
Judge Claire: At a glance, they just look like clay carvings.
Sasha: How about at a look that's less glance-y?
Judge Claire: Are you going to take the time to search them? And is everyone leaving the room with the pool and the crystal creatures?
Ariel: Well, I think we've got some time to spare, because now that he's not in danger of getting french-fried anymore, I'd kinda like my scale mail back from Klutz.
MSG: Sure. I guess it looks safe enough to change in here.
Elle: My characters are all in the room now.
Hettie: Mine as well.
Sasha: In the room and searching. Somebody took a lot of time on these army guys -- maybe some of them are special.
Akane: My characters will enter also. Door closed!
Judge Claire: Roll a search, Sasha.
Sasha: Pff. 9.
Judge Claire: Any intelligence bonus?
Sasha: Nope.
Judge Claire: You don't find anything, then.
Sasha: Ouichre will try too. She gets an 11.
Judge Claire: Two of the little figures, you see, are made of silver instead of clay.
Sasha: Nice! I'll p- ... no, I guess I won't pocket them, since that's my lawful character. She'll show them to everybody and say we can sell them and split the cash when we get back to town.
Judge Claire: Anybody doing anything else? No? Then Klutz and Clover finish swapping armor.
MSG: All right, I'm back down to my lame 11 armor class, so if maybe one of you hulking first-levelers wants to open the door, I'll stand aside for you.
Elle: Foxie's a warrior now, so she can lead the way. All she's got is a handaxe, though. I took battleaxe for my first-level lucky weapon, if somebody wants to trade me.
Hettie: Curious coincidence that she happened to pick a weapon the other group found in the burial chamber.
Elle: It's not a coincidence -- it's luck. Did I not just say battleaxe is her lucky weapon?
Hettie: Touché -- although I don't suppose that's typically a word used in fights with battleaxes.
Akane: Limp Snakish will surrender his rusty battleaxe for a handaxe. The weight of it -- very heavy for him, really.
Elle: I shall open the door, then.
Judge Claire: A spiral staircase leads down into the darkness.
Elle: I follow it. Do we have a torch, by the way, now that we threw away that one to distract the crystal beings?
Sasha: Yeah, Zilda does. I guess she can be second or third.
Judge Claire: Second is probably better given the narrowness of the stairwell.
Sasha: Fine. Second.
Judge Claire: You descend several stories downward until the stairway ends at a door.
Elle: When everybody looks ready, I open it.
Judge Claire: Beyond, you find an enormous, brightly lit chamber. At the far end is a huge throne atop a raised dais. A carved clay figure on the throne resembles the fire-spewing statue from the level above. In front of the dais, at floor level stand seven more clay statues -- strangely, they're all missing their heads or have them bashed in.
Ariel: Seven bashed in ... hey! Did we do that smashing up those skulls earlier?
Judge Claire: You might want to wait to chat about that, because in addition to the warlord and his seven decapitated generals, you see that the center of the room is taken up by a shallow pit, about 4 or 5 feet deep, in which stand dozens and dozens and dozens of clay soldiers.
Ariel: Um -- are they the size of the ones from the game room upstairs?
Judge Claire: No. Human sized. The light, you see, is coming from a pulsating crystal globe above the throne. With a series of jerky movements, the clay warlord breaks the silence, rising to his feet and thrusting a hand out toward you in a commanding gesture. In response, you see the ranks of clay soldiers start to shift where they are standing.
Sasha: Let's get that guy! Zilda makes a run for the dude on the dais. I'll try to stay away from the edge of that pit. Can I make it in one round?
Judge Claire: No. The room is about 80 feet long, and we have to roll initiative before Zilda starts her run. Let's keep rolling by player, even for the first level characters. I don't want to have to keep track of more than 6 initiatives.
Ariel: 16 for me!
MSG: 8.
Elle: 11.
Hettie: 16 for my characters as well.
Sasha: 12.
Akane: It's a 4 for me, and only because of the very agile Quickly Tightrope having +3.
Judge Claire: Well, at least that wasn't an attack roll, or it would have been a fumble. Aers?
Ariel: I guess we'll all run for the warlord dude like Zilda said. Phill, Noseele and Tweeter can do 60 feet in a round if they're chugging hard. Clover can only go 50.
Hettie: Lune asks if someone can trade her a sling for one of her weapons. She'll average a lot more damage that way.
Akane: Snakish has one and is poor with it. No trade needed -- I have another weapon for fighting by hand..
Judge Claire: Okay, those two characters take their turn on the stairs for the handoff, since Lune will need the ammo, not just the sling.
Hettie: Maudine runs after Ariel's coterie, then, and Feralia as well, though she can only manage 40 feet a turn even moving twice.
Judge Claire: Okay, so lined up along the right side of the room, in this order, are Phill, Tweeter, Noseele, Maudine, Clover, then an open space, then Feralia.
Sasha: I guess Zilda runs up into that open space in front of Feralia. My other two guys will run to the other side so we're not all tripping over each other too much.
Judge Claire: Elle?
Elle: Ferze has a sling, so if he gets inside the room, he's within 80 feet of the general, right? I'll take a shot at him. I'm minus 2 for range but plus 2 for agility. 16.
Judge Claire: You hit!
Elle: One point of damage. Foxie follows Sasha's characters toward the left side of the room. Likely Bi-tit is going to try to defy her name by hiding out in the stairwell. Argyr Ironskin is slow too. He'll hang out by Ferze to defend her if any statues come near.
Judge Claire: Klutz's turn, then.
MSG: Same as Foxie.
Judge Claire: The clay soldiers are starting to mill about, but kind of directionless-ly. Akane, your characters can go.
Akane: Three will move out of these stairs to defend our slinger also. Limp Snakish is still exchanging with Lune.
Judge Claire: It's a new round, then. Ariel? Your three lead characters are close enough to get into melee combat with the warlord.
Ariel: Let's do it, then! Phill pitchforks it with -- ugh, 7. Oh, and -2 for my bad strength. I can see from your face that's for sure a miss. Tweeter daggers with a 17, though! Hff. One point of damage just like Ferze. Okay, come on Noseele ... dagger! Noooo! I fumble. My fumbly roll is 2.
Judge Claire: You trip. Make a Reflex save of 10 or you're prone next round.
Ariel: 10 exactly!
Hettie: I'm next? Lune comes out firing with her sling. She misses wildly. Maudine rushes the warlord and pitchforks it -- 5 to hit. Feralia tries to get closer to the melee with a double move.
Sasha: I probably have to double-move this turn too, right?
Judge Claire: Yes. Zilda can get to melee range this turn with a double-move. Your other characters will be within a single move when their next turn starts. Elle?
Elle: Ferze is going to move 30 feet closer along the right side and then shoot her sling. Whew! 13 hits, right?
Judge Claire: Right.
Elle: Annd another 1 point of damage. Foxie and Argyr repeat their strategies from last round.
MSG: Ditto for Klutz.
Akane: Limp Snakish will move to protect Lune. My other characters, to protect Ferze.
Judge Claire: It's the warlord's turn! He attacks Noseele! 18 to hit. 6 points of damage. Sorry about that.
Ariel: I really liked her name, too! But I guess the silver lining is as long as at least one person dies, we get better experience for the fight, right?
Judge Claire: Right. The clay army within the pit begins moving with a little more direction. Some of the ones nearest the edges begin climbing up.
Ariel: Eek! All right, Phill pitchforks with a 10! Urgh, but he's so weak that makes it an 8. Tweeter stabs and misses. Clover moves up where Noseele was ... poor Noseele! Take this shovel to the face, clay-guy! Wham, 17! 5 points!
Hettie: Maudine jabs it with her pitchfork ... assuming it's still alive.
Judge Claire: It is. Well, I mean it's still animated, anyway. I don't know that it was ever alive.
Hettie: Well, whatever it is, it still is, because I roll a 4. If Feralia is close enough, she's going to throw a handaxe at the warlord.
Judge Claire: She's close enough, but remember the friendly fire rules.
Hettie: I roll a 17, so we're good.
Judge Claire: Even 1 hit point of damage destroys the clay effigy. With its destruction, the remaining statues lose their vitality, freezing in place wherever they stood, or toppling if they were off balance when the warlord died.
Ariel: Woohoo! Go, Hettie!
Hettie: The power of a halfling handaxe. I'll retrieve it, naturally.
Judge Claire: That battle wasn't so tough, really, but Noseele's death kicks it up to 3 experience points for the survivors.
Ariel: Yay! Time to level up!
MSG: I think that goes for everybody, at this point. Unless Likely gets docked for hiding on the stairs.
Elle: I'm fine with that; I've already leveled up.
Judge Claire: One point to Likely for prudence. Elves, give me a secret door roll to see if you spot something on your way to or once you reach the dais.
Elle: Lune gets a 14.
Hettie: 16 for Ouichre.
Akane: Dwimmerlet, 11.
Judge Claire: Lune and Ouichre spot an odd bit of paneling on the wall behind the throne. It's a secret door.
Elle: I'll bow to Ouichre's sharper eye.
Judge Claire: In a chamber beyond the door, you find a bronze rod engraved with half of a demon's face. The workmanship is wondrous. It must be worth a small fortune. There's also a copper brazier worth 10 gp, a suit of scale mail, a tome of some sort, and a variety of weapons: a longsword, a longbow with 40 arrows, a mace, a spear, a battle axe, a dagger, and a hand axe.
Ariel: How should we split it up?
MSG: First things first, I think we need to figure out which characters we're going to keep and play -- assuming this wasn't just a one-shot. No point handing stuff out to the cannon fodder.
Akane: But -- we are still in the dungeon! Is this prematurity? There could be more perils.
Judge Claire: We can call this one a wrap, I think -- unless someone's dying to go kill those crystal things or swim in the pool. As for continuing on, I'm game to. But I'd like us to get a little farther in Akane's campaign before we switch off again. I'll need some time to pick out a module and read up on it.
Ariel: I'm obviously going to level up Clover. Tweeter and Phill both kind of suck. Sorry, Phill.
MSG: I don't have many options.
Elle: You might be able to convince someone to give you one of their castoffs. I've got no use for Argyr, for instance.
Hettie: Feralia is not a bad character, if you ask me. I'll definitely be playing Lune in any further adventures.
Sasha: Henna doesn't totally suck. Ouichre rolled some shit spells and has a -2 mod for strength.
Akane: I don't know which character to pick ... Quickly, so agile, but his hit points, so infirm. Tuff Cheese has substantial in hit points, but his stats except in stamina disappoint. You can have the one I abandon. Probably you don't want Dwimmerlet or Limp Snakish; both are clumsy and unbrainful.
MSG: I really like halflings in this game, so I'll take you up on Feralia, Het. Thanks!
Hettie: You are thoroughly welcome.
Sasha: If I was you, Akane, I'd level up Quickly and Tuff both, and see which one's better after you roll their hit points and other stuff.
Akane: Intelligent! Thank you, Sasha!
Judge Claire: Okey doke! Well, you've got the list of loot and you've got characters to level up, so let's shut down here and next time we meet back up, maybe we'll get into that black tower in Akane's ruined town!
okey doke, back with more dungeon crawl classics! check out part one of this adventure if you want to know the deets so far!
Judge Claire: Everybody divvy up the loot from last sesh?
MSG: Yep.
Sasha: A hundred percent.
Elle: What loot?
Hettie: Elle and I were rather conspicuously denied a chance at the armor.
Akane: Still, though, there are two spears that did not impale Snover Dumountain or Growler Greene, correct?
Judge Claire: I thought about asking if anyone picked up the two that missed ... then I remembered which game we're playing and kept my mouth shut. No taking it easy on the zero levs!
Elle: Considering my best character has a quill for a weapon, I'll definitely grab a loose spear.
Hettie: Hm. If I give Lune LeFortune a spear, she'll be able to throw her dagger with +3 to damage from the Hawkeye birth sign and not render herself unarmed. Taken.
Judge Claire: All right, you find yourselves alone in the room with the now-motionless statues. What do you do?
MSG: I didn't already say so, but I would've put this heavy door down as soon as combat ended.
Sasha: I'm searching around the bases of the statues to see if there are any hidden compartments or anything. Plowed Henna is doing that, I mean. My other two gals are hanging out watching for danger.
Akane: Limp Snakish deposits the door also. Quickly Tightrope searches walls for hidden things. Tuff Cheese searches the flooring.
Ariel: Sounds like everybody's got the searching covered, so my squad'll chill.
Judge Claire: All right. Everyone searching make an intelligence check.
Sasha: A big 7.
Akane: Quickly rolls 13. It's 12 for Tuff.
Judge Claire: Sorry, nobody finds anything.
MSG: Okay, next door then, right? Klutz says somebody else ought to open it. He got seared up the ass last time.
Sasha: Plowed Henna will give it a try. Is this one locked too?
Judge Claire: No. When you pull on its handle, it definitely moves.
Sasha: All the way open, then!
Akane: Possibly we should have picked up the door for shielding again, but I remembered this tardily.
Judge Claire: Beyond the door, by the light of Phill's torch, you see a room large enough that the walls are shadowy and indistinct to either side, and the far side of the chamber is in complete darkness. Just beyond the torch's reach, a little left of center, an enormous figure looms in the barest hint of light.
MSG: Is it moving?
Judge Claire: The flickering of the torch makes everything seem a little shifty and unsteady, so you can't be certain.
Elle: Lune takes out her spare torch and says we should light it and toss it to the middle of the room to see what that figure is.
Sasha: Plowed takes out one of her torches and gives it to Zilda to carry. Zilda asks Phill if she can light it off hers.
Ariel: Sure!
Elle: I'm sure there's a chance throwing a torch will make it go out. Would my Hawkeye ability give me a better chance of landing it without extinguishing it? Or would it be better for someone with a high agility to make the throw?
Akane: Quickly is agile and willing, if needed.
Judge Claire: I'll let either one use their bonus on the roll.
Elle: I'll toss the torch from just outside the room, then.
Judge Claire: Roll to hit, then roll percentile dice for the chance of the torch going out.
Elle: 17 to hit. 56 on the percentiles.
Judge Claire: You land the torch right in the middle of the room, then, and it doesn't go out. In its light, you can see that the figure is an enormous statue, and that the room is a good 40 feet across. The statue is granite and 30 feet tall, depicting a man dressed in savage hides but with an intelligent cast to his eyes. His arm is outstretched, and the index finger is pointing directly at the doorway. Around his neck you can see carvings of necklaces and amulets. From his belt hang a broadsword and a grimoire. You think that there may be doors in each of the shadow-haunted walls, but they lie just beyond the full reach of the torchlight.
MSG: Let's get that door again. I don't like the way he's pointing at us.
Akane: This idea has my agreement.
MSG: Does the same basic crew want to go in first behind the door? Indy Biceps will move up where Growler Greene was.
Ariel: Phill is okay going again.
MSG: So I'm thinking last time we went left and lost two people, and this time the statue is a little to the left, so let's head toward the right-hand wall and check for that door. We'll be keeping the door-shield between us and the statue.
Sasha: My guys are going to head in and truck it to the left door.
Elle: Living dangerously again, hum?
Sasha: Kinda how I roll in these games!
Hettie: I just roll below the statistical mean.
Judge Claire: So if nobody else goes in, the door brigade moves at 15 feet per action toward the right wall, and Sash's characters at 30 feet per action unless any of them took the scale mail, in which case it weighs them down to 25 feet per action. As soon as the characters with the door enter and start moving through the room, a deep groaning sound comes from the base of the statue, and it swivels so that its index finger tracks the group. Limp and Klutz only have enough movement to make it to the door on the right, and they have to use an action on top of their movement allowance to get there, because it's 25 feet. Indy and Phill still have 5 feet of movement after they get to the door, and you can open a door as part of movement.
MSG: Indy will definitely do that then, because the huge dude's pointy finger creeps her out.
Ariel: Phill would too, but both her hands are full.
Judge Claire: As soon as the door opens, a blast of raging flame bursts from the statue's finger aimed right at the door-bearers. Indy triggered the blast, so it's targeting her. She gets +2 to her AC for the partial cover. I'm betting an 18 still hits, though.
MSG: Crazy easily. How toasted am I?
Judge Claire: 5 points of toasting, and if you're still alive, you're on fire.
MSG: How could I still be alive? Oof.
Ariel: If Phill's got the door open, he's going in wherever it goes to!
Judge Claire: It opens into a musty room that looks like some sort of burial chamber. Seven Shrouded alcoves line the walls -- three to each side and one on the far wall. Rusty arms and armor adorn the walls beside each alcove.
Ariel: Um ... I think I'll just move to one side of the door where the statue can't see or blast me.
Judge Claire: All right. Sash, your characters make it to the left door, which is 25 feet from the entrance. But you had to use some movement to move up and enter this room, so by the time you've reached the door, you've used more like 30 or 35 feet of movement
Sasha: Then Ouichre opens the door at the end of his 30 feet and uses his action to go through, and Zilda follows him, and then Plowed goes in too and Zilda says to close the door behind them, quick. So she does. Where are we?
Judge Claire: In a corridor that goes straight west for 25 feet and then curves to your left. It's now round two.
MSG: Yeah, Klutz is pulling the door-shield up close to the door Phill went through so it will mostly block the opening. Once it's propped there, I'm moving in and to the opposite side of the doorway from Phill.
Akane: Limp Snakish follows Klutz.
Ariel: I'm just holding my nose this round so I don't have to smell Indy cooking.
Judge Claire: How about everyone still in the spear-statue room?
MSG: Canterby saw that the statue blasted Indy in the middle of her turn, so he's going to run in, hope he can dodge it, and then get behind it and stay where it can't point at him.
Hettie: Bold.
Judge Claire: That's one word for it. 17 to hit.
MSG: Damn it.
Judge Claire: Two points of damage.
MSG: I'm steak.
Ariel: My 3 guys are hurrying over where Phill went. If there's room to squeeze past that propped up door we'll go in. Does it blast us on the way?
Judge Claire: It swivels to follow you with its fire finger, but doesn't let loose again. Maybe it can only attack once a round.I'll say there's room to get through the door where it's leaning. But you have to squeeze, so it takes your whole turn. Others?
Elle: Argyr is a dwarf, so she can only move 40 feet in a round going all out. She's going to follow the pack into the burial chamber. My remaining three, Ferze, Foxie, and Likely, do what Sasha's group did, and hope that they're not holding the door closed against us.
Judge Claire: There are only six squares' worth of hallway beyond the door, so that means the area is full unless someone opens the next door and goes through.
Sasha: Sure, once we see there's backup, Plowed will open the door and head in -- assuming it doesn't look insanely dangerous wherever it leads.
Judge Claire: There's a wide stone throne in the middle of this 25 by 25 foot room. The walls are hung with primitive clay tablets bearing some kind of strange symbols. Each one is a few feet wide and there are dozens of them. But you don't have time to check them out, because a big-ass snake crawls from behind the throne. It has rings of hellfire-red scales patterning its body and a vicious-looking horn in the center of its head. As soon as it sees you, it says, "I am Ssisssuraaaaggg, and you intrude on my guardianship." Roll initiative as it slithers toward you.
Sasha: Nice! 18 + 2 is 20.
Judge Claire: It goes on 3.
Sasha: Plowed Henna says, "Snake!" and rushes in to jab it with her pitchfork. She rolls a 2. Ouichre isn't too happy about fighting a demon snake -- she's only got a dagger. So she'll throw that at the snake and move back and ask if anybody's got a spare weapon. Natural 20!
Judge Claire: That's a crit! Roll d4 and add your luck modifier.
Sasha: Don't have one. I get a 2.
Judge Claire: Foe jabbed in the eye! Ugly bruising and roll an extra d4 damage.
Sasha: Sweet! Man, though, this die. My first crit of the game and it's only good for 3 points. Zilda drops a club for Ouichre and heads in to spear the snake. 12 to hit ... only I'm scared of this thing and I feel like that may not be good enough to get through its hellfire scales, so I'm spending 2 luck points.
Elle: Wow. Luck to spare, huh?
Sasha: Nope. But if it takes more than a 14 to hit this thing, I'm snake chow anyhow and I won't be spending those points later.
Judge Claire: 14 is good enough to hit.
Sasha: Yes! Argh -- I roll a 2 on the d8. So I spent two points of luck to do 2 damage? So weak.
Elle: The damage roll is technically another roll, though, so you could spend more luck and do damage point for point.
Sasha: If I spend any more my modifier goes negative, so I'll pass.
Judge Claire: The snake attacks. Odd, it goes for Ouichre. Even, for Zilda. I roll an 8, followed by an attack roll of 9.
Sasha: That wouldn't even have hit Ouichre, and Zilda's got the scale mail. Oh, plus, Ouichre dodged back out of sight after throwing her dagger, remember?
Judge Claire: Right, sorry! Okay, next ... Akane and Hettie still have characters in the first room.
Hettie: Feralia is in the same boat as Argyr was -- halflings only move 20 feet per action. So she heads for the burial chamber too. Maudine, Lune, and Cozened do the same thing Sasha and Elle's characters did.
Akane: Seems like both of those doors are becoming crowded. Can my characters reach the far door, go through, and close it behind us?
Judge Claire: If you've got at least 50 feet of movement in 2 actions, my reading of the rules says yes.
Akane: This exactly equals the movement of Tuff.
Judge Claire: Then on the far side of that door, you find the largest room yet. There's light here, diffusing up from a long, rectangular pool of water that runs the length of the room, which is over 50 feet. To each side of the pool, which is 15 feet wide, 5 pillars stand illuminated by the weak light. You see that you're not alone here -- shuffling, man-shaped things of crystal move slowly amongst the columns, sparkling whenever light from the pool glints off their crystalline forms. At the far right end of the room is a door.
MSG: Creepy.
Ariel: Yeah, creep-tastic.
Judge Claire: No one remains in the central chamber for the statue to fire at, so let's finish off the snake battle before dealing with the other rooms. Elle and Hettie, roll initiative for round 3.
Elle: 5 for me.
Hettie: 13 for me.
Judge Claire: Sash is first, then.
Sasha: Zilda spear! 7. Plowed pitchfork! 19, which I know is a hit, so 5 points of damage on it. Ouichre picks up the club but isn't quite brave enough to run back in with it because her strength's only 5.
Judge Claire: Hettie's turn.
Hettie: We're farthest from the snake, so I don't know that we can all reach it this turn ... but on the other hand, I don't know that there's a snake at all, do I? My group entered the hallway after the combat last round. We'll just wait to see what Elle does. Can we drop after her group in the initiative order?
Judge Claire: Yes, although that might also be after the snake; you don't know what its initiative was.
Hettie: Again, I don't know that there's a snake at all. We'll wait.
Judge Claire: Well, it's Elle's turn then, because the snake rolled a 3 last round.
Elle: Ferze moves to where he has a clear shot at the snake and readies his sling but -- well, I was going to say he'll hold his fire for fear of hitting someone in melee, but he's got a pretty good agility and I know a 14 hits. I'll take the shot. No, that's a 3. There's a 50% chance I hit one of my own side, right?
Judge Claire: That's right. And I roll a 15 on the percentile dice, so reroll your attack and see if you hit -- odd is Zilda, even is Plowed -- the die says Zilda.
Elle: My total is 10.
Sasha: Whew! Would have hit Plowed, but it bounces off Zilda's scale mail.
Elle: Foxie moves in with her handaxe and rolls an 11, which my strength makes a 12. I don't want to spend 2 points of luck because that will remove my +1 luck modifier. But I'm nervous about hitting with a 12, same as Sash was. I'll spend one point to make it 13.
Judge Claire: 13 hits.
Elle: 3 points of damage, then. If it's still alive, Likely tries to spear it.
Judge Claire: It's still alive.
Elle: I wish you'd said it wasn't, because that's a natural 1 I just rolled. Thank god Likely didn't get any of the scale mail. What die do I roll on the fumble table with no armor?
Judge Claire: d4 and subtract your Luck modifier.
Elle: That's a very relieving zero, then.
Judge Claire: You miss wildly but suffer no ill effects.
Hettie: Now that I grasp the presence of combat within the room, my characters will move in and attack, if possible.
Judge Claire: Whoever's first in your marching order can reach the snake. The other two can't, unless they have missile weapons.
Hettie: Cozened moves in with her dagger, then, and strikes with a ... natural 20! I'm shocked.
Judge Claire: d4 on the crit table, modified by luck.
Hettie: My total is 2, so it's the same as Plowed's critical, correct? An extra d4. 5 points total. Any chance we've blinded it by hitting both eyes?
Judge Claire: Blinding requires a higher crit roll. So it can still see, and it's still alive.
Hettie: Hmm. The question becomes, should Lune throw her dagger? She gets +3 damage from her birthsign, so I could theoretically bring our total damage to 25. On the other hand, a miss could easily kill one of my comrades. Lune is lawful, so I think she'll wait until next turn to move into melee.
Sasha: So your alignment is lawful pussy, huh?
Hettie: I refrain from comment.
Judge Claire: Snake's turn! I'm counting 5 characters it can reach, and this game comes with a d5, so I'm rolling it. 5 means it goes for the last one to get into melee, which is Cozened.
Hettie: And now the triumph of my crit becomes short-lived.
Judge Claire: With its modifier, that's well over 20. 7 points of --
Hettie: You needn't have rolled the damage; Cozened has only one hit point.
Judge Claire: Sorry about that. Sash, the order has come round to you again.
Sasha: Zilda spears it with a 19! 6 points of damage!
Judge Claire: It gives a thrashing spasm and dies.
Sasha: Whew!
Judge Claire: Before your very eyes, as soon as the snake goes still, its body disintegrates into ash, leaving only the wicked horn from its head.
Elle: Likely Bi-tit will have a look around the room ... probably check out those tablets first.
Hettie: Lune will examine the throne.
Sasha: Zilda's going to look at that horn -- but not touch it yet.
Judge Claire: The tablets show a combination of illustrations and ideograms --
Ariel: Is that like a grandma who's an idiot? I feel like that's a pretty insulting word.
Hettie: It's "ideo" as in "idea," Ariel dear. The "gram" refers to something written or drawn.
Ariel: I guess that's not so insulting then.
Judge Claire: It takes a bit of study, but you get the impression the tablets tell a story -- a tale of creatures who came from the stars and gave powerful gifts to a savage tribe. One tablet seems to imply that the creatures will return when the stars are right.
Elle: Do the tablets look like they're worth anything? Maybe I'm hoping not, since they sound heavy.
Judge Claire: They're pretty much just clay with stuff carved in them. You don't think they'd bring much at market. Lune, you don't get much out of looking at the throne. It's very large -- could have been made for someone of unusual proportions. It's oriented to face the door.
Hettie: Hm. That gives me a thought, but Lune is not especially bright, so I don't think it occurs to her.
Judge Claire: Lastly is the horn, then. Examining it doesn't tell Zilda much, Sash. It's wicked and demonic in shape, obviously not from any mortal creature. But you don't know if it has any special properties.
Sasha: If I wasn't chaotic and pretty eh in the smarts department, maybe I'd try to figure out if it has mystic powers or something. But that sounds boring to Zilda even if she thinks of it. I guess Ouichre is a sage, though. He'll pick it up and ... I don't know. Can you do that attunement thing in this game like in D&D. Definitely help figure it out if we can pull in that rule.
Judge Claire: In this game, you can try to get a sense of something's magic with a Spell Check.
Sasha: Great. Ouichre tries that.
Judge Claire: Roll the d20 and add your intelligence or personality modifier.
Sasha: They're the same. El zippo. Heya, though, the die comes up 15!
Judge Claire: After about 10 minutes of meditating on it, a fearful presence comes into your mind -- a sense of demonic attention. You feel like you could call upon it to aid you.
Sasha: Ouichre is pretty "Dude, no way!" about that, I'm guessing, since she's lawful.
Elle: You decided to play a lawful character? Not your usual style.
Sasha: I mean, she's got a 5 strength. I didn't expect her to live through the adventure or anything. She asks if anybody wants a horn that lets them ask a demon for favors.
Elle: Likely will take it if no one else wants to.
Judge Claire: Anything else for the crew in this room?
Sasha: I'm good.
Elle: Done.
Hettie: I think you can move on to someone else.
Judge Claire: All right. So room 4 spent a couple of rounds fighting and about 10 minutes poking around. Let's move on to room 5. Checking my notes here ... looks like a total of 8 of you made it in here, so it's pretty cozy.
MSG: Other than the whole "burial chamber" vibe you said it was giving off.
Akane: I recall a description of arms and armors on the walls. Limp Snakish will examine them with curiosity.
Judge Claire: Most of it looks rusted and worthless, but you spot a handaxe, a battleaxe, and a suit of chainmail that don't look entirely dilapidated.
Akane: Chainmail! It's much better than zero armor, so I will retrieve that one and wear it.
Judge Claire: As you're taking it down from the wall, you hear a clattering, rattling sound from beyond the shroud of the alcove it's hanging beside.
Akane: Snakish is less curious about clattering sounds than about armor for protection.
Ariel: Um ... Phill's going to use her pitchfork to push aside the shroud from one of the not-rattly alcoves.
Judge Claire: Inside you see a pile of bones -- and as soon as you disturb the shroud, they begin twitching and scraping, as if trying to get at you. But they're not assembled into full skeletons, so the pile barely manages any movement toward you. The skull is snapping its jaw though.
Ariel: Yeek! Can I pitchfork it without getting close enough for it to bite at me?
Judge Claire: Pretty easily. Roll to hit.
Ariel: Boo. My strength modifier makes it a 7.
Judge Claire: A 7 actually misses.
Ariel: Clover will smack it with her shovel, then. 14!
Judge Claire: That's a hit.
Ariel: Only 1d4 damage though. 2. Poop.
Judge Claire: 2 hit points of damage crushes the skull.
Ariel: Really? Awesome! I'm going to the other curtain that rattled to smash it too.
Hettie: Feralia wonders if that's the smartest thing to do, considering it's not certain all the alcoves hold the same configuration of bones ...
Akane: Snakish suggests someone could pull aside a shroud for him and he could sling a rock at a clattering skull if there is one.
MSG: Klutz will push one aside with his shortsword. "Have at it, Snakish."
Judge Claire: Both Clover and Klutz reveal jittery piles of bones behind their shrouds, the skulls trying to creep forward by jaw movements, snapping viciously with each inch or two they gain.
Akane: My slinging attack is 15. The die is maximum -- 4 points.
Judge Claire: The skull shatters.
Ariel: Shovel to the brain-bone! Does a 9 hit?
Judge Claire: It does.
Ariel: Bam! Four points of damage for me too!
Judge Claire: Another skull destroyed.
Sasha: It's definitely going to turn out you guys need those skulls for something, you know.
Akane: My intelligence -- much too low to consider this. I shoot another skull if there is one in the next cubby.
Ariel: I'm pretty smart, but kinda too caught up in smashing undead skulls.
Judge Claire: Both of you find clattering bone-piles in the next alcoves you search.
Akane: My next slinging is only a 7.
Ariel: Oh no! I fumble!
Judge Claire: This could be bad. Roll the d12 for your fumble, modified by luck.
Ariel: I super don't want Clover to die! What? 13?!
Judge Claire: That's the d14 you rolled.
Akane: Such odd dice in this game.
Ariel: The 12 sider is better ... I guess? It's a 7.
Judge Claire: You drop your weapon. You'll have to reach into the bone pile to get it or find a different one.
Ariel: No way am I reaching in there! Can somebody crunch this skull for me? I guess Phill will try her pitchfork. Bleh, a 2.
Judge Claire: So far, there are 3 out of 5 opened shrouds with their bone piles rendered motionless by the crushing of their skulls. That leaves 2 skulls still snapping away and 2 alcoves not yet opened.
Akane: I will aim my next slinging at the shovel-guarding skull. An 18, ending in 3 points of damage.
Judge Claire: Crunch. Looks like you can get your shovel back, Aers.
Ariel: Okay, I -- wait, did you say looks like?
Judge Claire: I did, but I didn't mean anything by it.
Ariel: Whew! I grab it and head for the next alcove, then.
MSG: You know, Claire could just be saying she didn't mean anything to lull you into a false sense of security.
Ariel: She wouldn't do that! Would you?
Judge Claire: The Judge is supposed to be merciless in DCC, but that's not the same thing as being mean. So probably not.
Ariel: Okay, then -- hold it, probably not?
Judge Claire: There's always a certain amount of risk, you know?
MSG: Klutz will push aside another shroud for Snakish.
Akane: Gratitude! My total this time -- 8.
Ariel: I'm shoveling with a 9.
Judge Claire: Both hits.
Akane: Damage is 4.
Ariel: Me too!
Judge Claire: Crash and smash. Only one alcove left.
MSG: I'll hold the curtain aside for whoever wants it.
Ariel: Roll initiative, Akane!
Akane: Limp Snakish is probably not so competitive, but if challenged, he will roll. 15.
Ariel: Dang. You go first then.
Akane: I miss.
Ariel: Rats, I do too.
Akane: Next is a 19, for 2 points of damage.
Judge Claire: It's craniated. The skull crushers can have 1 experience point for their efforts.
MSG: What about assistant skull crushers?
Judge Claire: Sure, them too.
MSG: Cool.
Judge Claire: Aside from the two remaining axes and the busted up bones, all you find are crude funeral masks that seem to have fallen off the skulls in their ages of undeath. The features on the masks are primitive, almost ape-like.
MSG: Hey, did we get any experience for the roasting statue room?
Judge Claire: I wouldn't say you've completed that room yet.
MSG: Oh. Right.
Hettie: If it's going unclaimed, Feralia will take that rusty handaxe so she has a spare one to throw.
Akane: How effective is a battleaxe for this game?
MSG: Pretty badass. They're two-handed weapons and do 1d10 damage. But they're slow, so you have to roll the d16 for initiative instead of d20.
Akane: Hmm. But my group of characters rolls as one, making use of the highest modifier. So this seems unpenalizing.
Judge Claire: That is kind of the way the rules work out. But right now you've got only one character active, so you'd be rolling with Limp's disadvantage.
Akane: Still, I would like a battleaxe. My agility is poor, so to hit with a sling is more difficult. Also, obviously, damage is much less.
Judge Claire: Okay. Let's move on to the room with the pool and the mysterious crystal creatures. Akane's characters are all by themselves in there.
Akane: These characters have only weakling weapons. 1d4 damage each. Also, they are only a trio. Probably they'll delay to see if anyone joins them, and only act if the strange crystal creatures threaten.
Judge Claire: Do you have a light source?
Akane: Only the watery glow from the pool. My characters all failed the roll to remember they had copper to spend.
Judge Claire: In that case, you see the creatures shuffling randomly around the room, sometimes drawing a little closer to you, others wandering farther away. They don't seem to notice or express any interest in you if you're just standing there. As time passes, you count a total of 6 of them moving aimlessly about the room.
Akane: I am not encouraged to attract the attention of 6 to fight my 3. Hopefully allies will arrive soon.
Judge Claire: Well, then. The burial chamber room spent less time exploring their chamber than the demon-snake room, so that room gets to go next.
MSG: Damn it. Well, never mind, Klutz probably wasn't smart enough to think of it anyway.
Elle: And what did you think of?
MSG: They might have tried to bite us, but while the skulls were still animated, we could have rolled them out into the main room to see if they'd draw the statue's fire.
Sasha: I told you you'd need them, didn't I?
Hettie: It definitely would have been a clever idea.
MSG: Before we head out there, though, I have rope. Any chance I could lasso Canterby's body and drag it in? He's got that scale mail still and it's not doing him any good.
Judge Claire: I'd say zero chance of you lassoing him without exposing yourself to a flame blast from the statue.
MSG: Okay. Then I say we send two people with the best armor out behind our door shield to draw its fire. Then everybody else runs for that door to the north while it's reloading or whatever, and then on the next turn, the door guys run into the room too.
Elle: Argyr asks why the north door.
MSG: Does she want to run all the way across the room to the door on the west wall? That'll put her and Feralia out in the open for at least two rounds.
Elle: Excellent point.
Hettie: Feralia concurs.
Akane: Limp Snakish has chainmail now. He is willing to continue door-lugging.
MSG: Well, I've only got leather armor, so I think it would be nice if one of the scale mail characters took a turn with the other half of the door.
Ariel: Um, I'll trade you my scale mail for your leather. Clover's my best character, so I don't want her carrying that door for target practice!
MSG: I'll take that deal. But if Klutz gets cooked, you've got to give me one of your characters to play.
Ariel: Okay!
Judge Claire: Hmm. I just realized, putting on Limp's chainmail and Klutz borrowing Clover's scale mail actually takes a chunk of time. Somebody roll a d4 for the burial room guys, and somebody else roll a d10 for the snake room guys. That will determine how many minutes apart you head back into the statue room.
MSG: 4 for the boneyard bunch.
Sasha: 9 for the snake snuffers.
Judge Claire: Okay, 5 minutes apart still then. Do Limp and Klutz head out?
MSG: No sense waiting, really.
Akane: Snakish is prepared.
Judge Claire: When you re-enter the room, the statue pivots to track you, but doesn't fire.
MSG: Oh yeah. It didn't fire the first time until someone opened a door. I guess it reset. So ... let's maneuver the door-shield to block the statue's line of sight to the north door. Everybody gets in a line between the shield and the north door, Then when we open that door, the statue will have time to shoot once, which hopefully our shield blocks, and then we all run through.
Elle: Argyr is willing to try that.
Hettie: Feralia too.
Akane: Limp also.
Ariel: My whole gang is for it.
Judge Claire: The problem there is that the statue is closer to that north door than to any other door. Your shield can only block a single row of squares, and the base of the statue is only one square away from the north door.
MSG: Damn. Wait ... wait ... hear me out, now ...
Sasha: Sounds like this might be good!
MSG: If it's not shooting at us until we open a door ... what if we take one of the dead bodies and tie it across the pointy finger?
Hettie: That seems deeply wrong and logistically difficult. But if the Judge allows it, I'm for giving it a try.
Judge Claire: Sure, you can try it. But it's a 30-foot statue, remember? Is someone going to climb 20 or 25 feet up to its arm, haul a body up somehow, and then climb back down? That would be multiple skill checks to pull it off without falling -- and unless you have training in your background that would let you climb well, you'd be rolling a d10 for those checks.
MSG: We don't have to climb, though. We could throw a rope over the arm and then haul somebody up there ...
Judge Claire: Even if you skip the climbing rolls, whoever it is would have to wrestle the body into place while straddling a granite arm. You can risk it if you want, but I'm still thinking you'll have an excellent chance of falling.
Elle: I'm starting to think our chances of the statue missing Klutz and Limp when they open the north door are better than the chance whoever tries getting up on that statue will have of pulling it off without falling to a skull-splitting death.
MSG: Okay, yeah, okay. I guess Akane and I can get right up to the door, open it, hope neither of us gets fried, and run through to clear the way for everybody else to dash across in the same round.
Judge Claire: You maneuver into place, then. Is everybody ready for me to say what happens when the door is opened?
MSG: Sort of.
Sasha: My characters aren't there, so this is a popcorn moment for me. Let's go!
Elle: Argyr's ready.
Hettie: Feralia as well.
Akane: Snakish definitely.
Ariel: My bunch too!
Judge Claire: All right. Odd, it blasts Klutz, even it blasts Snakish. 16.
Akane: My chainmailed armor class is 14, according to the book.
Judge Claire: Actually it's 13, because it's rusty chainmail.
Akane: Disappointing, but logical.
Judge Claire: I roll a 9, plus 6 is 15.
MSG: Nice knowing you, Snakish.
Akane: I prepare for fiery death.
Judge Claire: The door gives you plus 4, though.
MSG: Oh yeah! I was so worried about getting crisped I kind of forgot why we were carrying it.
Akane: If still alive, I will hurry through the north door.
Ariel: My guys are sprinting over there too!
Judge Claire: It's close enough for everyone to get through before the next round begins.
MSG: I prop the door-shield in place again, go inside, and close the door.
Akane: My three characters offer greetings.
Ariel: Now we just need the people from the other room to catch up!
MSG: Except that we have no idea whether any of them are still alive.
Hettie: Oh, ye of little faith.
Akane: This ignorance is accurate, though.
Judge Claire: Also, you're still several minutes ahead of the bunch in the snake room. And not long after you enter, one of the crystal creatures seems to notice you and start slowly making its way toward you.
MSG: That's weird. Is it because there are a bunch of us now and we're making more noise?
Sasha: Or maybe it's that Zilda and Phill have got torches going.
Judge Claire: Another of the things seems to notice and head your way. They don't seem to be in a hurry.
Elle: I say we test the torch idea out -- have somebody take both torches and move away from the group and see if the crystal statues change direction.
Ariel: Phill will volunteer. But somebody's got to hold her pitchfork.
Sasha: Zilda'll swap with you, torch for fork. Wait, no, Zilda's in the snake room with all the rest of my guys. Sorry.
Ariel: Okay, I guess Phill just takes our only torch and tries to move away from the group only not in a direction that gets me closer to the thingies.
Judge Claire: That's a little difficult, because it looks like the other creatures are starting to take notice too. But as soon as you move away from the other characters, the crystal beings seem to focus on you and change their paths.
Ariel: Um ... uh ...
MSG: Just put the torch on the floor and come back.
Ariel: I do that!
Judge Claire: The creatures continue to move toward the torch, ignoring your characters.
Ariel: Great! Only now we don't have a light.
Akane: Remember, there is light from this pool.
Ariel: Oh yeah.
Judge Claire: What do you do?
Elle: Argyr suggests we move farther away from the torch to discuss any plan we want to make.
Hettie: Feralia agrees with that.
Akane: Also, my characters.
Ariel: And mine!
MSG: If Klutz spots that door at the back and there aren't any crystal guys near it, he'll head over there to investigate.
Judge Claire: Okay. The six crystal shapes surround the torch and just stand there, like they're basking in its light or heat. If nobody decides to go take a whack at them, we can switch over to the snake room while you guys poke around in this one.
Sasha: Sounds good to me. First thing we need to do is decide who's going to run out there as roast-bait.
Elle: Ferze Sniffleskins volunteers. She's sickly and only has 1 hit point, but she's light on her feet and might be able to dodge the fire blasts.
Hettie: Of course, if the statue has reset again in the ensuing 5 minutes since the last group ran through, she may not have to dodge.
Judge Claire: Yes, but you don't know about that.
Elle: Ferze gets ready to sprint.
Hettie: My characters are ready when Ferze is.
Sasha: Same here.
Elle: I open the door and take off, then.
Judge Claire: The statue swivels to track you, but doesn't fire yet.
Elle: Well, Ferze was brave enough to volunteer, but she's not brave enough to hang out and wait to get charcoaled. She'll run duck under the door-shield and open the door into the pool room.
Judge Claire: As soon as she does, the statue lets loose another jet of flame. But it only rolls an 11.
Elle: Ferze will duck to one side of the door once she's in. Then, if it happens to be the side closer to the crystal creepies and farther from the other characters, she squeaks in alarm and hurries toward the group.
Judge Claire: Okay, so here's the deal, then. That hallway is six squares long. Ferze was in the square by the door. That means the last couple of characters are still in the snake room when Ferze takes off, and they'll have to spend 65 feet of movement to get into the door.
Hettie: Hm. We didn't specify where each of our characters was, but if we follow the last-in, last-out convention, that puts my two characters as the ones lagging in the statue room for an extra round. I'll have Lune take the lead, though, so that at least she'll be right outside the door and hidden by the shield-door when the fireworks go off.
Judge Claire: All right. Then the round ends with everyone else having run across, Lune hidden by the shield-door, and -- who's your other character again?
Hettie: Maudine Aubergine.
Judge Claire: Then Maudine is the sitting duck. New round.
Hettie: Here comes my next casualty.
Judge Claire: The round begins. The statue has already swiveled to cover your two characters as they were running last round. And now ...
MSG: Good luck, Het!
Hettie: Hopefully for Lune -- her luck score is 18. But Maudine's is 8.
Judge Claire: You're both in luck, though, because the statue just makes a clicking sound instead of spewing fire. It seems like it's out of fuel.
Sasha: Lucky!
Hettie: Indeed ... especially since it means my characters are now the only ones in the room to loot the two dead bodies.
Judge Claire: They both burned until there was nothing left to burn, though, so only non-flammable loot remains. 25% chance for each non-burnable item to be too damaged for use.
MSG: Both the bodies are my characters, so I'll roll ... you end up with a crowbar, the stone scale mail, and 24 coppers off of Canterby Choosers, and an iron spike and 52 cp from Indy Biceps.
Hettie: Lune will don the scale mail. The two of them will split the copper, and Maudine will take the rest.
Judge Claire: That winds up the statue room, then. Multiple casualties there means you all get 4 experience points. That means at least some of you have gone over 10 xp, and since I think this is a good wrap-up spot for the session, those characters can level up for next time.
Sasha: Yes! Big-time payoff for all my guys going in that snake room!
Elle: But now you've got three characters you have to figure out what class you'll level up in.
Sasha: When exactly have I ever had trouble picking that kind of stuff in a snap?
Elle: Now that I think of it, never, I suppose.
Hettie: I'll probably need considerably more time to decide for my two characters than Sasha will take for her three.
Sasha: In fact, watch this -- bam! Cleric for Zilda. Bam! Ouichre's an elf, so that's automatically her class, right? And then bam! Henna's a cleric too. Personality's her only good stat, and I'm thinking we may need lots of healing at some point.
Elle: I'm counting 8 first level characters, though, which seems like quite a lot with the majority of our zero level characters still alive.
MSG: Based on prior experience, I think there's plenty of room for the scenario to end with a final boss fight that will thin us out significantly.
Sasha: Bring it!
Judge Claire: Next time, then.
Ariel: Thanks, Claire! This game is the bomb, even if my guys are still all stuck at level 0!
Judge Claire: You're very welcome!
well, for whatever reason, even though we're having a great time in akane's d&d campaign, dcc and the idea of a 0-level funnel adventure popped into msg's head, and he mentioned it, and we said, hey, why not give it a shot? i haven't gamemastered in a while, so i volunteered to be the "judge" as they call it in dcc.
everybody else rolled up 4 characters each! (typing from here on courtesy of msg. thanks, babe!)
MSG:
Canterby Choosers - beggarly urchin
Growler Green - lucky but unpersonable trapper
Indy Biceps - an indentured servant with 16 strength
Klutz O'Stab - an outlaw with poor agility
Akane (who was very excited to play this game she's heard so much about):
Limp Snakish - a guild beggar
Dwimmerlet - a dull and clumsy elven artisan
Quickly Tightrope - a wizard's apprentice with exceptional 18 agility
Tuff Cheese - a rough-mannered mendicant distinguished by having 6 hit points
Ariel:
Clover Under - a grave digger whose birth sign was a lucky clover
Tweeter Cheets - a con artist with "bird song" for a birth sign
Noseele Knowsele - a lucky but intellectually and emotionally underwhelming elven sage
Strongwill Phill - a turnip farmer of extreme feebleness and not much better intelligence
Elle:
Ferze Sniffleskins - a likely-doomed trapper with a 3 stamina and 1 hit point
Foxie Axe - a well-rounded woodcutter whose birth sign was a cunning fox
Argyr Ironskin - a dwarven blacksmith with a decent armor class
Likely Bi-tit - ironically named because she has strikingly well-suited stats for an elven barrister, and thus Elle doubts she'll live to level up
Sasha:
Ouichre Reader - a low-strength elven sage
Zilda Chill - an orphan born under the sign of harsh winter, but with quite a good agility
Snover Dumountain - a dim-witted dwarven apothecary, also born in harsh winter
Plowed Henna - a radish farmer with terrible agility
Hettie:
Maudine Aubergine - an unlucky potato farmer
Cozened Roselyn - a cutpurse with some of the worst stats of the whole bunch
Lune LeFortune - a locksmith with an astonishing luck of 18
Feralia - a halfling chicken-butcher born under the sign "raised by wolves"
(wait! me typing again to give a spoiler alert: the adventure we're playing is "the portal under the stars," which is the introductory module from the rulebook. so as long as you don't mind having it spoiled for you ... let's go!)
Judge Claire: An unruly mob of you folk has gathered at the ruins outside of town by the chill light of night's darkest hour.
Ariel: Ooh! I know this one! It's almost sunup, right? Because they say it's always darkest before the dawn.
MSG: Actually, there's a period of twilight before dawn that's pretty much as long as the twilight after sunset, so people who say that aren't technically being accurate.
Elle: They also say it's always dorkest before the yawn.
Sasha: Burn! Ow, she got you there!
Judge Claire: Not to take sides, but I really was trying to imply more like midnight than closing in on morning.
Ariel: Dang. I was wrong.
Elle: Worse, MSG was right. I hate it when he's right while being so ... mmm ... word please, Hettie?
Hettie: Pedantic.
Judge Claire: Anyway ... midnight! Dark! The ruins outside of town! Some of you were there when Old Man Roberts lay on his deathbed, telling tales of his greatest regret in life. When the stars align just right, he said, a portal opens amongst the ruins beyond town, a portal to a mystical realm glimpsed down a long stone corridor, where motionless shining figures armed with spears gleamed, and flashes of what must be treasure sparkled farther on. Roberts hadn't the courage to explore himself, and has regretted it ever since. But with his rattling last breath, he tells you that the Empty Star is due to rise this very night. If you're brave enough to dare what he could not, who knows the riches you might find.
Ariel: Ooh, Tweeter Cheets is a con artist, so he's probably totally down for some riches!
Akane: My characters include both a beggar and a mendicant. How are these professions different? It's a puzzlement. But how they are the same is, riches have definite attraction for them!
Judge Claire: The strange constellation you were told to watch for rises. Its light falls on three great stones that form an arch, and within the arch a shimmering glow appears and brightens. The portal is open! Through it, you see the long stone hall spoken of by Old Man Roberts. A door lies at the end.
MSG: All right, I'm sending in Klutz O'Stab to have a look at the door.
Akane: So assertive! Is this not a game of rolling initiative?
Judge Claire: There's initiative in combat, but most of the time whoever has the first thing to say gets to go first.
MSG: Anyone coming along?
Elle: My characters are waiting for Klutz to show us which of the floor stones are trapped.
Sasha: Snover Dumountain's not too bright. He'll go in too.
Judge Claire: No one else?
Akane: A pause seems wise. Dwimmerlet gives an encouraging wave to Klutz and Snover the dwarf.
Judge Claire: It's very dim at the end of the hall where the door stands. What are you using to see?
MSG: I've got a rope.
Sasha: Snover's a dwarf, so he can see in the dark, right?
Judge Claire: Technically the rules only give first level dwarves infravision, but that's always seemed wonky to me, so I'll allow it.
MSG: We spent all that time rolling 5d12 copper pieces each during character generation ... can we say we used some of that to buy torches or at least matches?
Judge Claire: Anybody who wants to can make a DC 12 intelligence check to have had the foresight to prep.
MSG: Four no's for me.
Akane: I think only two of my characters have intellect enough to think of it. But they roll 5 and 6.
Ariel: Ooh! I roll a 13 for one of mine -- and it's Noseele Knowsele, the elven sage! That totally makes sense. And Strongwill Phill rolls a 17!
Elle: Likely Bi-tit is my only roll high enough to think of shopping.
Sasha: Plowed Henna makes it for me, barely.
Hettie: 17 for Lune LeFortune and 19 plus 1 is 20 for Feralia.
Judge Claire: Get shopping, then.
Ariel: Uh ... oil flask ... sack ... flint and steel ... torches ... got it!
Elle: Mostly the same for Likely.
Sasha: Plowed Henna gets a large sack and loads up on torches, plus a flint and steel.
Hettie: Lune's purchases run along the same lines. Feralia buys rope to go with her grappling hook.
Judge Claire: Okay, then. Of the two characters in the hallway, only Snover can see the door well enough to make out a pattern of gems set in the door around chest height.
Sasha: When you say "pattern" ... do you mean, like, a pattern even a 5 intelligence can spot?
Judge Claire: Roll for it.
Sasha: 10 after my penalty.
Judge Claire: Nothing strikes you as meaningful about it.
MSG: Can I see a handle? I'll try opening it.
Judge Claire: There is a handle, but the door feels firmly in place.
MSG: Like it's locked? I throw my weight against it and try busting it open.
Judge Claire: Roll strength.
MSG: 19!
Judge Claire: The door bursts open.
MSG: Yes!
Judge Claire: But a searing flash of light also bursts out of the gem pattern. Make a reflex save.
MSG: Oof ... here comes my 8 agility ... 13?
Judge Claire: You save, taking only half of a d8, which comes up on a 3.
MSG: Are you rounding up or down?
Judge Claire: If you spend a point of luck I'll round down.
MSG: Okay, then I'm not dead quite yet.
Akane: Wait! I think this luck deserves explaining, since it is spendable this way!
Judge Claire: Basically, you can spend one point of luck to modify a roll by one point.
Akane: Does this luck return with rest?
Elle: Oh, no, that would be too easy.
Judge Claire: When you spend it, it's gone ... except for thieves and halflings of level 1 or above.
Akane: I will hoard mine with care, then.
Sasha: Did I get roasted too?
Judge Claire: No, just Klutz. In the room beyond the door, Klutz sees faint silhouettes of figures. Snover clearly sees four of them -- armored figures with spears raised as if about to hurl them. They appear entirely motionless, though.
Sasha: I tell Klutz maybe we better wait for some light -- and maybe back a ways from this door. Then I call for some light. "Light!"
Ariel: Strongwill Phill lights a torch and moves up. Noseele too, since she's an elf and can see in the dark.
Elle: My characters will all follow Phill's light in. Likely hangs back toward the rear.
Sasha: The rest of my guys go too.
Hettie: And mine.
Judge Claire: Unless anybody speaks up that they're hanging back, I'll assume everyone goes down the hall to where Snover is.
Sasha: I tell 'em about the speary figures.
Ariel: Can I see the door broken open? Is it like, knocked all the heck off its hinges?
Judge Claire: No, but it looks like it's only hanging on by one of them.
Ariel: What if we take it off and use it as a shield to hide from the spear guys? That's Clover's idea. She's my only smart one.
Judge Claire: Two people could probably get it loose and carry it for cover. Another couple people behind them might get a bit of benefit too.
MSG: Soon as anybody says that, Klutz says, "Yeah, let's go!"
Akane: Limp Snakish is willing to assist in this.
MSG: I'm putting Growler Green in the second row from my bunch.
Ariel: You guys should probably have somebody with a torch along. Strongwill Phill will go if you let her.
Elle: Phill is a her?
Ariel: Yes, it's spelled with two L's.
Elle: I don't see the feminine significance, but okay.
Judge Claire: Okay, let's roll for initiative before you guys go in. Each player rolls for their group, using their highest initiative modifier. You might want to number your squad of characters front to back in the marching order.
MSG: 12.
Akane: 17!
Ariel: I rolled a 20 but I don't want to go first!
Elle: 17.
Sasha: 8.
Hettie: 11.
Judge Claire: Okay, the door brigade moves up. Klutz and Limp, roll strength to get the door loose from its last hinge without dropping it.
MSG: Yech. I roll a 6.
Akane: My roll is a 20, and natural!
Judge Claire: Klutz almost flubs it, but Limp Snakish saves the day. They move into the room with the door, followed by Growler and Phill. Ariel, what do your other characters do?
Ariel: Um ... hang out and get ready to duck if there's any spears coming our way?
Judge Claire: Akane, you're next.
Akane: My characters exhibit caution as well. Let us observe what happens with the door.
Elle: My entire crew waits too.
MSG: Canterby's chaotic. He'll stay on Phill's heels. Indy Biceps hangs back with the others.
Hettie: I'm next? I think Cozened Roselyn is the only one with the combination of high risk and low intelligence needed to venture in. She'll be near Canterby.
Judge Claire: And the rest of yours, Sash?
Sasha: No guts, no glory. We're all headed in!
Judge Claire: All right. The room is 25 feet wide with the door in the middle of the wall. It's 20 feet deep, and there's another door on the far wall. The four figures are arranged two to each side of the door. How do you maneuver once you're in, door foursome?
MSG: Growler says, hey, maybe we edge to the left and keep the door angled to block all 4 of them as long as we can, instead of going straight across where the ones on the ends will get a shot at us sooner?
Akane: Limp will obey this idea.
Judge Claire: In you go, then. When you get partway across, the statues throw their spears! We've basically got 6 people in the lead and Sash's 4 behind them. I'll roll this d8. On a 1, it's Limp, 2 is Klutz, 3 or 4 is Phill, 5 or 6 is Growler, 7 is Canterby or Cozened, 8 is one of Sash's crew. First spear -- 3! Phill, it rolls to hit you with ... only a 5 total. Next spear goes for Growler with a 13 to hit. You get +2 to AC for cover.
MSG: That still only gets me to 11 AC.
Judge Claire: 6 points of damage then.
MSG: Well, sucks to be him. First casualty, folks!
Judge Claire: Third spear ... one of Sasha's. Who's your first in line, Sash?
Sasha: Snover.
Judge Claire: 14 to hit, 3 points of damage.
Sasha: Casualty number 2.
Akane: So fatal, this game! Possibly even more than Mothership!
Judge Claire: Last spear is headed for Phill again.
Ariel: Nooo, Phill!
Judge Claire: Another bad roll. You're safe. Everyone who's in the room but not hiding behind the door sees that the statues seem to have pivoted and thrown their spears mechanically, and now are motionless again, with their arms extended in throwing position.
MSG: Klutz is still hiding behind the door just in case.
Akane: Limp Snakish as well.
Sasha: This means free spears, right?
Judge Claire: Two on the floor, two to be pulled out of Snover and Growler's ribcages.
MSG: Canterby calls dibs on the Growler-gut spear. My 3 survivors are divvying up his stuff, too.
Sasha: I'm searching the statues. Anything on 'em?
Judge Claire: Actually, yes. Their armor is scale mail made of beautifully enameled black stone.
MSG: Scale mail? Damn, that stuff's got a good AC, right?
Judge Claire: +4.
Akane: I propose each player who lost a character should gain armor for consoling.
Ariel: That seems fair.
Elle: And the other two suits?
Akane: If initiative still operates, Ariel is first and I follow, correct?
Elle: So now your true colors show, hmm? Lured us in with consoling the victims and then very reasonably slide in the initiative thing that gets you one of the suits?
Akane: I'm showing only a red color of embarrassment that you would think this about your dear Akane!
Elle: I'm joking, of course.
Akane: Possibly I am joking too. Could the red be embarrassment of being caught in connivery? It's a mystery of insoluble.
Judge Claire: All right, time to shut this puppy down for the night, I think. Multiple fatalities makes this a 4 experience point encounter, so everybody write that down.
MSG: Nice.
Akane: So far, I enjoy this game! Maybe if my characters were fatalities, though, I would have enjoyed it less.
Sasha: Hey, early on getting a guy whacked just means your other guys have more stuff and you've got fewer things to keep track of, so it's kind of a win anyway.
Hettie: All I will say is that mathematically speaking, this dungeon had best not have 12 rooms in it, or at this rate no one will live through the end.
Judge Claire: No comment!
(part 2 is right here if you want to read on!)
he's been paying way too much attention to the world lately and not enough to himself and the people he needs and the people who need him.
he does this a lot, right?
i mean, it's a big world, and it doesn't make any sense that things don't work the way they ought to, and you've kinda gotta stick your head in the sand to avoid being reminded of that every day. only the thing is, it doesn't have to be sand, you know?
so we had a talk, and it was one of those, "dude, i'm right here," talks, and it ended up with him turning on the light and us looking each other in the eyes until he saw me and the world the way we were 16(ish) years ago when i arrived in his life and we were younger and it looked like maybe things would go the right direction politically speaking and there were actual good super-hero movies coming out for the first time in my life and a new star trek movie too and dang if it didn't just seem like maybe everything could be okay.
and even though we can't get back to those days, we've still got some decent super-hero movies going on, there's a great star trek show in its third season, and his eyes and my eyes still see youth and color and infinite possibility when we look at each other and remember that it's all there to see.
which means yeah, the talk worked and yeah, he feels better, and yeah ... we're obviously going to have that same talk again. and again. and again.
but i'm here for it as long as he'll have me.
